1. I want to make macarons, and prove that I can get the meringe dry enough to not spread out all over the cookie sheet. (Thrice bitten, fourth shy.)
2. How much can the meringue for macarons be toyed with? I imagine a basil meringue cookie – chiffonade of basil leaf, not basil oil – with a black pepper lemon curd in the middle.
3. This requires egg whites at least a day old, that will have dried out somewhat. Can I dry them uncovered in the fridge, or will they pick up the scents of whatever else is there?
(4. Aside – can’t wait for the pork belly to finish curing into bacon. Tomorrow, maybe.)
(5. On the same tangent – never smoked a bacon, maybe roast half and smoke the other half over lapsong souchong, a smoked black tea? —Focus.)
6. Where am I going to come up with that many egg whites? What can I do with the yolks?
6a. Pastry cream – vanilla custard thickened with cornstarch.
6a-1. Ooh, cream puffs and eclairs….
6b. Lemon curd uses yolks, doesn’t it? Maybe that’s my answer.
6c. Wonder what effect egg yolks would have on chocolate ganache.
6d. Hey, I’ve got pancetta from Greatful Bread in the fridge. Maybe I can make a nearly-authentic spaghetti carbonara.
6d-1. Yeah, and I biked a bunch today – maybe that offsets the carbonara.
7. Oops, almond flour. Need to get more from the store.
8. Why am I baking all of this, mainly just to prove to myself that I can (and to have it ready to go when I decide I need it down the line)? I may just have to eat this all myself. Hm, not the best idea.
9. Why didn’t I stop to get the awesome local flat iron steaks I saw earlier today at Revival Market? 45 minutes until they close, but we may be going out to eat for dinner tonight instead.
10. I wish I knew how to make buttercream. I mean, I can read and follow recipes, but that’s different from *understanding* buttercream.
11. Why do I care about buttercream? What am I going to do, eat a bowl of chocolate buttercream?
11a. Yes.
12. Flat iron steak, green beans and shallots, and … and … and what? Noodles? Rice? some kind of starch?

This is the constant noise in my brain. This is why I obsess about food.

My passport expires today, two days after 9/11. I could write a whole retrospective on where I was on the day (in a meeting in London) or how it impacted me (Mom had come to visit, stayed a couple of extra weeks), but I decided that there was enough rehashing already on the internet. As I wasn’t nearly as traumatically affected by that day, I thought it best to write about what my passport and I had seen together.

Ten years and four months ago, I had left my first passport in my jeans and put it through the wash. The front cover separated from the picture page, and amazingly I managed to fly internationally four more times on it with only some stern looks from ticketing agents. Then 9/11 happened, and I decided it high time to renew my passport at the US embassy.

So. Ten years ago…

… I was living, however temporarily, in London, England.

… I lived off of restaurant food and could make a mean risotto. I was only just a year or so into my soon-to-be-obsession with cooking.

… chicken stock was an exotic preparation.

… I collected comic books. Every Wednesday, when the new books came in, my comic store would pull my subscription aside, and I would buy the stack and have a binge reading night at a coffee shop. Most times, I’d forget to eat dinner.

… I discovered Japanese cuisine meant more than sushi, and that ramen doesn’t have to be cheap from a packet.

… I sang (however awkwardly) with a semi-professional a cappella troupe.

… I had never been to SXSW. Hadn’t really heard of it, actually.

… had really no damn clue how to dress myself. I was aiming for the thickest goatee I could grow, let my hair grow as long as it would (almost to my shoulder!), and – being in London and all – wore a black trench coat that made me look as if Crosby, Stills, or Nash had joined the X-files.

Since then…

… I’ve learned to cook more. Competently, if not always well. My challenge now is finding enough time and willing subjects to really practice what’s rattling around in my head.

… I moved back to Houston.

… I got married.

… I discovered, to my surprise, that I’m more of a cat person than a dog person.

… I don’t collect comics anymore, although I do miss it and try to keep up from afar.

… I became a homeowner.

… twice. (Temporarily, we hope.)

… I’ve managed to help shepherd a kid through middle school, high school, and into college. I’ll take a victory lap wherever I can.

… I still work for the same company.

… I’ve seen friends come and go. Thankfully, more came than went, and those that went really didn’t leave, they just went somewhere else for now.

… I don’t introduce myself by my website anymore (“Don’t worry. You’ve never heard of it.”) but instead by my twitter name.

… I’ve stopped blogging twice officially (three times, if you count this hiatus – so much to say, so little time to organize it into linear thought).

… and I’ve eaten well.